Monday, Jul. 26, 2004 + 4:21 a.m.
You have to understand that this NEVER happens. This child will only eat like 5 things on earth that are not sugar or chip-related. So, needless to say, I was thrilled beyond belief. At almost 9 years old, it�s amazing to me that he grows at all. I�m thinking, �Bring it on!� We were all looking over our menus, eating chips and salsa and enjoying conversation. And that�s when he asked the question. It wasn�t the question itself. Well, actually it was, but it was mostly the VOLUME that was so disturbing in the presence of several full tables of other diners. �MOM, WHAT IS A FUDGE-EYE-TUH (phonetic spelling) ANYWAY???" In unison, my husband and I both shushed him loudly. My husband looks at me and whispers, �Did he just ask what a vagina is?� �I think so,� I squeaked.
�What made you ask that, Sweetie?� I asked my son. �It�s here on the menu, Mom, under Appetizers�, he answered. My husband and I exchanged looks. Since when were vaginas an APPETIZER as opposed to a full-fledged meal??? And WHY was my son thinking about ordering one? Luckily he showed me the menu and I breathed a sigh of relief. It was a fajita. A flaming, juicy, do-it-yourself soft taco, which also should have been listed as an entr�e. Might as well have been a vagina. He ordered the chicken nuggets.
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I am the Grim Reaper! Master of all that is |
